First Time Fixer - Film Day!

I feel 20 pounds lighter.

We did it. We made it to reveal day! It’s starting to hit me just how exhausted I am. I’ve been running off of adrenaline for so long, just pushing through the fatigue, working as much as physically possible, telling myself - almost there! We got to the house early in the morning and spent the whole day filming. I have been surprised to learn that I am not that terrible in front of the camera. I’m no movie star, but you know what, I did ok and it wasn’t a total flop. I was much less nervous this time around. The very first day, when the crew filmed our “before” tour, I was crazy nervous, and although he tried to hide it, I’m pretty sure dad was too, lol! I had expected to be given lines to say, or cues, but quickly realized it would be very off the cuff. The direction we were given went something like “ok, walk in this room and just tell us about it.” Or “point out what you plan to change.” I don’t know how dad and I were able to pull it off, but we did. This time now knowing what to expect, I think we were both able to enjoy it a bit.

My friends Joey & Erica Svec came to be our “surprised friends” to see the house. They really were surprised and impressed, and they were so so good on camera! The dialogue went pretty smooth and natural, even though we had to repeat the same things multiple times as if it were the first time, which feels pretty awkward. We laughed a lot, and I hope they enjoyed it too!

Jonny and the kids came over near the end to film a little. They hadn’t seen it since I had decorated and made it all pretty. They ooohed and ahhhed, I was just bursting to share it with them, and so blessed that they were all so proud of my work.

So here we are.

Now that it’s done, I almost don’t know what to do with myself, which is both exhilarating and a little sad. I’ll miss this house! We’ve got the real estate listing photos scheduled this week, and hope to have it on the market within a couple of weeks. We’ve already had some interest in it, so I suspect it will sell fast. Now we just wait for our episode air date…this has been a tough secret to keep all these months! We will be as surprised as everyone else for the episode though. You do all this self-filming along the way, and upload it to their cloud, and they do all the editing. So we have no idea what footage will get used, or cut, or how they will tell our story. I know they will represent us well, but I do hope the world sees a few things :

My dad as a kind and generous father, who works so hard. He has worked hard his whole life to provide for us, and even still he is working to bless his grandchildren. I hope the world gets a glimpse of just how special he is. He has been living on his own since he was 15, and worked hard for every single thing in his life, without any handouts. He is what you would call a “self made man,” but if you ask him he would quickly respond, “no, it’s not me, its the work of Jesus in my life.”

My husband as a hard working and supportive partner. He has taken on more responsibilities these past months so I can do this work that I have loved. He has talked me off the cliff on days I was ready to just give up on the whole thing, and he continues to push me to go for bigger and better things.

My mom as powerful force of stability and love in our family. She has kept my children while I worked, spent hours working into the wee hours of the night painting at the house with me, and has reminded me over and over that she knew I would do great at this (even though I have often doubted myself.)

And for me - I hope the world sees a regular mom, who loves to create beauty in the world, and will do literally anything for her family. I’ve jumped into this thing, facing my fears and insecurities head on, and I’m still figuring out how keep moving forward. I don’t know exactly what’s next. But I do know that taking a risk, and putting myself out into the world to be known, is better than hiding away and suppressing the dreams in my heart. The world might not “get me” or think what I create is anything special, but there’s something so freeing about being confident in who you’re made to be, saying - “hey! this is me, this is what I love, this is what I create, and you know what, it’s ok if I’m not your favorite.” We can’t all be everyone’s favorite. I think I’ll settle for being Jonny’s favorite, I only need one super fan anyways..